Bearing Witness: Retirement From the Wrong Side of the Divide
Mark Crothers | Nov 25, 2025
I'm very confused. I think this article is a good fit for HD, but I'm really not sure if anything I write is suitable anymore. Hopefully, I'm not offending anyone posting this piece to the forum. I bumped into a guy I played with as a kid. He's six foot six and built like a linebacker, but he looks old and worn out now—forty years in a hot tarmac crew hasn't been kind. He asked me what I was doing these days. I never told him I was retired. I vaguely talked about juggling lots of commitments and left it at that. I wasn't lying. I have sporting commitments, and I juggle social and travel schedules with more affluent people. I'm sometimes uncomfortable telling certain people I'm retired. My social circle is very diverse from a socio-economic point of view—that's a combination of randomness and a callback to my family history, growing up in a deprived public housing scheme. The ties that bind are still there; I'm friends with some pretty dodgy but interesting characters. These characters don't mix with my more affluent friends, and I don't make any effort to bring the different circles together. I genuinely think it would be the equivalent of throwing water on a cooking oil fire—an incendiary and explosive combination. It wouldn't end well. A dinner party or restaurant gathering would be an alien concept. A lot of pints, pool, and a few games of darts along with very, very strongly worded banter is the perfect night, preferably without your wife. It might sound stereotypical, but it's reality. I still join the craic and show my face a few times a year. It's very different but refreshing. This social disconnect between worlds is very real and, to my mind, very concerning for society as a whole. Straddling this divide at such a personal level has rammed home the ever-widening financial gap that, although always there, has definitely been accelerating over the last five years or so. My friend Nigel is a 62-year-old self-employed builder. Things are tight. The fuel injectors on his van packed in, and he's scrambling to get another truck on the road. No van, no work, no money. That's the grim reality. The discomfort around saying I'm retired isn't about modesty—it's about the sheer unfairness of it. I know too many people, good people, who've worked themselves into the ground and still can't see a way out. They're not lazy or feckless; they're just trapped in a system that's rigged against them from the start. Low wages, insecure work, rent that eats half their income before they've bought a jug of milk. Retirement isn't even on their radar as a realistic prospect—it's a fantasy for other people, the ones who got lucky or started with advantages they never had. What really gets me is watching mates from back home still grafting in their sixties, bodies breaking down, knowing they'll probably work until they physically can't anymore. There's no pot of gold waiting, no pension worth mentioning, just the grim arithmetic of benefits that don't cover the bills. Meanwhile, I'm out—done, finished, free to do what I like. The randomness of it seems wrong. We started from similar places, same schemes, same schools, but a few breaks here, a different choice there, and our trajectories diverged completely. They're still in the struggle; I'm not. It doesn't feel like something I earned through superior virtue. Not everyone can own the means of production. And here's what really worries me: this isn't getting better, it's getting worse. The gap between those who can retire with dignity and those who'll work until they drop has widened dramatically in the last few years. Pensions have been gutted, housing costs have exploded, and the precarious nature of work means people can't build anything stable anymore. When I'm around people still stuck in that grind, saying "I'm retired" feels less like sharing news and more like rubbing salt in a wound. I don't know how to fix it. I've got a unique vantage point. I think the least I can do is bear witness to the inequality before I slink back to my middle-class retirement lifestyle. It's not much, but it's all I have. The simple fact is: sometimes hard work and superior effort is met only with superior exhaustion.
Read more » Ripples Through Time
Mark Crothers | Dec 4, 2025
I was catching up with one of my former employees recently, someone who'd been critical to my business for years. She left a few weeks after I sold the company and has moved into a senior managerial role elsewhere. As we were wrapping up our conversation, she laughed and said she had to get back to being a productive member of society. Then she headed off to work.
It was meant as a joke, obviously. But it stuck with me. The implication was clear enough: I'm no longer productive. I'm retired, which apparently means I've stopped contributing anything meaningful to the world.
Is that really true, though?
I'm still participating in the economy, my portfolio generates capital gains that I convert into spending on goods and services. That spending keeps people employed just like signing paychecks did, even if it's less direct.
But I contribute in ways that have nothing to do with money. I childmind my grandkids regularly, which lets my daughters go to work and have something resembling a social life. That's not nothing. My daughters earn income, pay taxes, and support their own families. None of that happens without me showing up. The ripples from that weekly childminding spread further than I can see.
Beyond family, I've found ways to contribute to my wider community. I play racket sports and now help with development courses, encouraging people, young and old, to stay active. I've also gotten more involved in teaching financial literacy, helping people in my family and social circle learn to invest and manage their money. I do it because I enjoy it, but there's real value in it. Society benefits when people are healthier and more financially secure, and I've got the time now to help make that happen.
Here's the part I think we overlook entirely: past contributions don't just disappear when you retire. They ripple forward. I built a business over nearly three decades that still exists today. It still employs people, still generates wealth, still serves customers, all because of work I did years ago. I'm not actively running it anymore, but my effort continues to matter.
This isn't unique to me. Think about teachers whose students go on to become engineers, doctors, or entrepreneurs. Think about emergency responders who saved lives that went on to touch countless others. Past contributions echo into the future, shaping society long after we've stepped away from our desks.
Maybe the real issue is that we've defined productivity too narrowly. We equate it with employment, with earning, with being "on the clock." But contribution comes in many forms, and some of the most meaningful ones don't show up in GDP figures or tax receipts.
So when that nagging voice in the back of your mind suggests you're no longer useful now that you're retired, reject it. You're not less valuable because you're not working. You're just contributing differently. And if you built something worthwhile in your career, you're still contributing even when you're doing nothing at all. The ripples are still spreading. You just can't always see them.
Read more » The 34% Return I’m Glad I Missed
Mark Crothers | Feb 13, 2026
Last February, just before I retired, I was wrestling with how to generate my retirement income. I flirted with the idea of moving 25% of my portfolio into a Vanguard UK equity income fund. I thought deeply about it—the fund historically yields above 4%, and combined with an annuity I was considering, it would have nicely solved my paycheck dilemma.
Eventually I decided against it, mainly because of the concentration risk. Betting that heavily on a single economy felt like too many eggs in one basket. I kept my small 2% position in the fund and maintained my globally diversified portfolio instead.
I can't help but notice that UK fund has been my portfolio's standout performer over the last year—trailing 12-month returns of 34.1%. Meanwhile, the 25% I didn't reallocate stayed in a boring global mix that returned about 12%.
It's a classic case of "the one that got away." Watching a fund I almost bought climb 34% while my diversified holdings plodded along is enough to make any retiree's heart sink just a little. I wouldn't be human if I didn't admit that.
But looking at this strategically, my decision was actually sound risk management—and I have no regrets.
In investing, it's tempting to judge decisions by their results rather than the reasoning behind them. A 34% return would have been fantastic, but it doesn't retroactively make a concentrated bet "safe." If I'd moved 25% of my portfolio into a single-country fund and the economy had tanked due to unforeseen political or economic shocks, I'd be calling that same decision reckless.
I didn't miss a "sure thing"—I avoided a significant risk. The fact that the risk didn't materialize this time doesn't mean it wasn't there. Choosing stability over speculation is the cornerstone of retirement planning.
More importantly, the experience has strengthened my confidence. Every time I'm tempted to second-guess myself when I see a hot performer, I can now ask: "Am I judging by outcome or by process?" That question alone is worth more than the 22 percentage points I "left on the table."
No regrets—just validation that my decision-making process is sound, even when the outcomes don't prove it…but I have to say, it's still rather annoying.
Read more » Owning My Sin Premium
Mark Crothers | Jan 16, 2026
I'm an index investor, which obviously means I don't pick stocks. It's a comfortable position. When you own the entire market, you're not making choices, you're just participating in the market as a neutral observer.
My strategy has always been simple: buy broad index funds, reinvest the dividends, ignore the noise. No stock picking, no market timing, no cleverness required. The kind of investing you can explain at a dinner party without boring your guests too much.
I'm rotating some capital into the developed Europe index at the moment. This got me reading one of those breakdowns of what you actually own when you buy an index fund. Pages of holdings, sorted by weight. The usual suspects at the top, technology, healthcare. Then, scattered throughout in smaller percentages, there they were: tobacco companies, defense contractors, gambling operators, alcohol producers.
I'd never really thought about it much. That's rather the point of index investing, isn't it? You don't think about it. You own everything, which means you own nothing in particular. Responsibility gets delightfully diluted across thousands of holdings.
But all the war that's on the news, stories of big tobacco fighting a rearguard action in the developed world and pushing for bigger market share in the developing world makes you think: I own a tiny slice of those companies. Not because I chose to invest in arms manufacturing or tobacco specifically, but because they're part of the index. Which means every quarter, I'm slightly enriched by their dividends.
The sin stocks are there, performing exactly as the research suggests they should. Outperforming more often than not. Propping up the index returns that I'm receiving in retirement. The structural advantages are all present, regulatory moats, demand, high dividends. They're profitable precisely because they're selling products people can't or won't stop buying.
And I benefit from that. Passively, automatically.. But I still benefit.
I could switch to an ESG index fund. They exist now, plenty of them. Screen out tobacco, weapons, gambling, whatever offends your particular conscience. The performance would probably be fine, maybe slightly lower. The expense ratios are higher.
But I haven't done it. Time will pass and I'll still be in the same broad market funds. The sin stocks will keep performing. My retirement accounts keep ticking upward. ESG seems a bit suspect to me, maybe I'm just too cynical.
Why not change? Partially inertia and my cynicism of green washing, I suspect ESG is mostly a solution to the appearance of the problem rather than the problem itself and I'm not paying a premium for PR work. Also performance. Those sin stocks genuinely do boost returns. Mostly, though, I think it's because making the switch would require acknowledging something I'd rather not: that there's no such thing as truly passive investing. Every portfolio is a choice, even the ones that claim to be neutral.
The Sin Premium is real. It's in my portfolio right now, boosting my returns in ways I honestly don't examine too closely. And I suppose, talking about honesty, that's the most honest thing I can say about it all.
Read more » Beyond the Party: How Introverts Might Quietly Win at Retirement
Mark Crothers | Jun 30, 2025
I was reading an interesting article by Kristine Hayes, a contributor to Humble Dollar a few weeks ago. In it, she discussed her introverted nature. Since then, a thought's been developing in my mind: Could an introvert have a distinct advantage when accumulating wealth for retirement and an above-average chance of enjoying a successful retirement? I consider myself, for want of a better description, a "closet introvert." While many people who know me genuinely think of me as the "life and soul of the party," it's largely an act. I have a mental switch I can "click on" at will to be a very sociable extrovert when the occasion requires. I genuinely really enjoy it at the time, but it drains me after hours of this charade, and I'll be looking for an "out" to excuse myself from the gathering. I'm just happier in more intimate settings, so this thought is of much interest to me. This transition into retirement represents a significant life adjustment. However, for us introverted individuals, this may be to our advantage, allowing for a more seamless and fulfilling experience. Introverts recharge their energy through solitude. This trait would fit perfectly with the increased time retirement affords. Unlike extroverts, who might struggle with the end of work related social life, introverts often embrace the quiet for personal interests like reading, creative hobbies, or self-reflection. That preference for deeper experience with a smaller circle means we can maintain fulfilling social lives without the constant demand for extensive social evolvement. From a financial perspective, it seems to me introverts are well positioned for retirement. There's a strong likelihood that introverted people are less driven by the need to shop until you drop thinking. Their internal mindset means they are less susceptible to social pressure to accumulate material goods or partake in the buying mentality that nowadays is so common . Their preferred activities are often inherently less costly, such as hobbies that can be enjoyed in solitude. This tendency towards less costly living throughout their working lives provides the possibility of greater savings and a stronger financial foundation for retirement. Furthermore, their deliberate and thoughtful decision-making could extend to personal finance, making them less prone to impulsive spending and more inclined towards prudent planning and conservative investments. I have no actual proof of this idea, and it is purely the speculative ramblings of my mind; if nothing else, it perhaps gives you some insight into the daily workings of an introverted personality's thought process. But could it possibly be that an introvert has a secret edge for retirement? I hope so because I've secretly always wanted to have an edge over others! I did try to link to the article but couldn't figure out how to.
Read more » I Don’t Like to Judge…But.
Mark Crothers | Nov 9, 2025
I'm pretty much a non-judgmental person, though this isn't a virtue I've cultivated or a moral position I strive toward. As my wife Suzie has pointed out on many occasions, normally in an exasperated tone, I tend to wander through life in a state of "fuzzdom." Suzie's phrase, not mine.
Case in point: last week my opinion was asked about the dress sense of the weird guy with the high heels, lime green miniskirt, and shocking pink topknot hairstyle we passed while crossing the road. My reply was honest—I couldn't even remember crossing the road. I wouldn't make a good detective.
I find the occasional marital tension this causes to be gloriously amusing, but sometimes my unintentional "fuzzdom" is penetrated by what I consider the unusual behaviors of people around me.
The other day I held open the door to a convenience store to let two young women pushing prams and trailing children enter ahead of me. They must have been regulars, as the clerk greeted the tattoo-covered and unconventionally dressed young women by name. The children, as they all do, kept picking up candy bars and asking for them, only to receive sharp rebukes and have them roughly removed from their hands.
The two women then proceeded to purchase their "usual" $50 of lotto and $30 of instant win tickets, two packs of cigarettes, and a four-pack of energy drinks. They kindly conceded to the household budget and purchased $5 of electricity and $5 on a prepaid gas card, and with an exasperated tone reluctantly let the kids each have a 10-cent candy lolly before leaving the shop.
I paid the clerk for my selection, wished her a good day, and left. The whole incident left me feeling sad and a little unsettled and uncomfortable.
On the drive home my mind kept replaying the scene, and I couldn't help but judge the young women. I haven't walked in their shoes—though I've worn shoes thin enough. Growing up in Ireland during the Troubles, I knew what it meant to feed coins into a meter and pray the electric would last. I knew what choosing between heat and food felt like.
Surely their priorities are wrong? Even as I thought it, I knew the judgment was too easy. Perhaps the lottery tickets are hope, the only escape route when every other path to security is closed. Maybe those cigarettes are the one small claim to pleasure in a life that grinds. And the children? Everyone's had days when patience evaporates and everything feels impossible. I can see all this, understand it even, but that doesn't quite dissolve the judgment. It just makes it more uncomfortable to hold.
The money spent on gambling and addictive tobacco would be better used for their personal financial future. If you can spend over $125 on indulgence, you can't really argue there's no money to create an emergency fund or set up retirement accounts. Their family budget could be better served by buying more gas or electricity rather than spending on vices. Maybe they could show a little more parental grace to their children.
But here's what gnaws at me: I don't know if I'm judging from understanding or from the particular blindness that comes after escape. When you've clawed your way out of poverty, does it make you wiser about it, or just more impatient with those who chose differently? I really don't know.
This I do know: there are better uses of money than those young mothers' choices. But I also know that judgment from someone who made it to the middle-class bubble—however I got here—doesn't help them. Life can be difficult beyond my slightly privileged circle now, and it was difficult within my unprivileged circle then.
Judgment can be easy, but understanding and solutions are not. The uncomfortable truth is I prefer my "fuzzdom"—not because I don't understand, but because I understand just enough to know I can't fix it, that's up to the individual.
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