Mind Games
David Gartland | Mar 4, 2024
IN MY ENGLISH CLASS in junior high school, we read a play called I Remember Mama. It was a story about a poor Norwegian immigrant family living in San Francisco in the early 1900s. The mother ran the household while her husband went to work and the children went to school. The mother was in charge of the family’s finances. Any time a family member needed extra money, he or she would have to ask Mama for it. She’d listen to the request and, if it was critical, she’d get the money from the petty cash fund. If there wasn’t enough petty cash, she’d ask the person if it was important enough to justify withdrawing money from the bank. Upon further review, the person would say it wasn’t. The big surprise: As we learn at the end of the play, there was no bank account. Instead of saying, “we can’t afford it,” Mama wanted family members to decide on their own that the item wasn’t important. This would allow them to save face and not feel poor. They squelched the desire themselves and moved on. My mother-in-law would tell me of her upbringing in New York City. Her parents were Chilean immigrants who didn’t have a lot of money. They raised their six kids on her father’s salary. They were poor, but so was everybody else in the neighborhood, so they never thought of themselves as poor. My mother-in-law’s life was just like the characters in the play. With money so tight, she constantly had to decide that some purchases just weren’t important. A digression: Two famous actors came from the neighborhood. When they were kids, Lauren Bacall and Burt Lancaster were friends with my mother-in-law’s siblings. What I found most interesting about I Remember Mama: Because family members believed…
Read more » It’s Only Money
David Gartland | Nov 6, 2023
MY FATHER DIED WHEN I was 15 years old. My mother didn’t work outside the house, so we now had no money coming in. She eventually got a job as a receptionist in the local hospital’s X-ray department, but she only worked weekends and holidays. Meanwhile, by then, my older brother was married and out of the house, so he wasn’t affected by this change in our family’s financial circumstances. As I saw it, no money coming in—or relatively little—meant poverty, and I considered us poor. I didn’t want to live in poverty, so wealth became my overriding goal. But my view of our family’s financial circumstances wasn’t shared by my mother or brother. While my mother often used the phrase “we can’t afford that,” she didn’t mean that we had no money and she didn’t behave as though we were poor. Rather, she just didn’t want to spend money on the item in question. It wasn’t until years later that I found out why my mother and brother didn’t consider us poor. As it turns out, my father had purchased a group life insurance policy with a $500,000 death benefit. Why was this kept from me? I don’t know, but it was. Through my teenage and early adult years, I felt I needed to help out as best I could. I got part-time jobs in high school and college. My goal was to never be a financial burden to my mother. Fast forward to 2007. My mother died. My brother and I were co-executors and co-beneficiaries of my mother’s estate. My status as executor was only established two years earlier, when my brother had my mother’s will rewritten while she was in the hospital. At the time of my mother’s death, my 64-year-old brother, his 63-year-old wife and his…
Read more » Back to Life
David Gartland | Apr 25, 2024
SOME PEOPLE CAN LOOK at a blank page and imagine a new creation—perhaps a new business or a new house. I can’t. What I seem to be pretty good at is taking something that’s broken and coming up with creative solutions for fixing it. It's like a game or a puzzle. The goal: Bring this broken object back to life as cheaply as possible. When, say, a washing machine or a dishwasher breaks, the repair person will look up the manufacturer and order the necessary replacement part. The repair person will install the part, and charge you for labor, plus a marked-up price for the part. Most folks are accustomed to this, and view the expense as the cost of doing business. I see it differently. The manufacturer’s parts are designed to fit the original product, but that fit comes at a premium price. Suppose a part breaks on your Ford SUV or pickup truck. Yes, you could go to a Ford dealership. But what most people don’t understand is the dealership makes its largest profit not on the sale of a vehicle, but from servicing it. When something needs repairing, the dealership only installs original equipment manufacturer (OEM) parts and it charges high hourly labor rates. Folks who go this route soon start complaining about how expensive it is to keep their vehicle running, so they elect to buy a new one. That means not only a new auto loan, but also an incentive to get the new vehicle serviced at the dealership, so they don’t void the warranty. It’s a nice racket for the dealer. Instead of OEM parts, there are aftermarket parts sold at places like Advance Auto Parts, AutoZone, NAPA and O’Reilly. Typically, they’re much cheaper than OEM parts and, in most cases, the aftermarket part…
Read more » The Simple Life
David Gartland | Dec 17, 2024
WHEN I STARTED learning about investing, I stumbled upon a book at my library that immediately grabbed my attention: The Lazy Person’s Guide to Investing by Paul B. Farrell. A portfolio championed by the book consisted of just two mutual funds—one stock index fund and one bond index fund, with 50% of your portfolio invested in each. With only two choices to make, decision-making becomes far more straightforward. Farrell's suggested 50-50 split simplifies the process even further. The strategy underscores the beauty of simplicity—a lesson I took to heart. Why complicate matters with additional funds if just two could suffice? Diversification is a popular investment strategy. But how many funds do you truly need? Do you need exposure to private equity, gold, real estate? The options seem endless. But perhaps less is more. For some investors, constantly tweaking their portfolio is comforting. The activity gives them peace of mind. For them, tweaking and touching and buying and selling is a wonderful way to live. Doing something feels better than doing nothing. Yet a landmark paper, based on Schwab trading data, suggests the more people trade, the lower their investment returns. Often, the stocks they sell perform better than the new ones they buy. That’s why Vanguard Group founder Jack Bogle used to advise investors, “Don’t just do something—stand there.” All this strongly suggests that investors could benefit by doing less. Frequent trading may reflect overconfidence in our investment expertise. It reminds me of the scene in The Wizard of Oz when Judy Garland and crew drew back the curtain to reveal the Wizard. He’s just an ordinary man, busily pulling on different levers to make impressive sound effects. My “simplicity is best” approach applies to more than just my investments. My wife and I approach retirement differently. She fills her…
Read more » Special Care Needed
David Gartland | Nov 5, 2024
FATHERHOOD WASN'T one of my life goals. I didn’t feel like I had a wonderful childhood, so I didn’t think I had much to offer my offspring that would help them to lead a wonderful life. If children happened, okay, but it was never a goal. My first marriage ended because I placed money over fatherhood. I thought not having kids would speed my path to wealth. My wife disagreed—and walked out. When I met my current wife, I thought about the whole kids thing again. This time, I decided a life without children might not be so great. Unfortunately, having a family was easier said than done. My wife suffered numerous miscarriages. Finally, we found a fertility specialist who got the job done. My son was born and we were off to the races—or so we thought. Our pediatrician noted that our son wasn’t walking as soon as he should. She suggested a neurologist. A neurologist? What’s his brain got to do with his feet? The neurologist discovered the first of many issues with our son. The good news: This was early on. As more issues arose, we were mentally prepared. I handled the financial end of things. My wife became the primary caregiver. My goal for my son was for him eventually to have a job. I saw that as the first step on the road to independence. His public school education was in self-contained classes, not mainstream with all the “typical” students. Typical is the term used, not normal. Do you know what a normal teenager is? I don’t. They’re all weird. During his high school years, which continued until he was 21, my son spent time "job shadowing" at local businesses. I assumed one of his employers would recognize his brilliance and give my son a…
Read more » Aiming High
David Gartland | Mar 7, 2024
MY WIFE NEEDED KNEE replacement surgery a few years ago. Her health plan, which was provided through the school district where she worked, was a preferred provider organization with a large network of doctors. After some research, my wife decided she wanted her operation done at New York City’s Hospital for Special Surgery. I love hearing about people's lives. I’ve long read biographies to learn how others gained their fame or fortune, hoping for pointers that would help me with my own life. I also pepper people with questions about their background. When we met my wife’s surgeon, I knew he’d graduated from Princeton University, which is near where we live. But I wanted to know more. I asked him what his major was. When I found out, I was surprised. “Art history? That’s a big leap to orthopedic surgery.” “My father knew that I’d have to work hard in medical school, so he wanted me to enjoy my undergraduate years.” “Did you know where you were going to med school?” I asked. The surgeon’s response: His father had graduated from Columbia University’s medical school, and he’d make sure his son got in. Early in my career, a manager once told me that “rank has privileges.” The rich have always enjoyed benefits that elude others. Clearly, my wife’s surgeon was part of the 1%, getting the benefit of an Ivy League education, plus guaranteed entrance to medical school. It must be nice. Knowing what the 1% have can either inspire us or defeat us. In his book The Magic of Thinking Big, David J. Schwartz makes the argument that the higher you aim, the higher your final landing spot will be. I’ve always wanted to be rich. Did I get it all? No. But my lofty goal meant I probably…
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