Resolved: New Journeys
Jiab Wasserman | Jan 23, 2022
WE RETIRED AND MOVED to Spain in 2018. We were excited and eager to explore our new home and a new culture. We traveled a lot, mostly in Spain, but also the rest of Europe and Asia. But since the pandemic started, our travel has been limited. Indeed, COVID-19 sped our return to Dallas. I’m happy that we’re now closer to our sons, and can see family and friends in person. But having lived in Dallas for 28 years, I already know the city well. Still, I plan to keep exploring—but this year I’ve resolved to take my retirement journey in two different directions. First, during the ultra-strict Spanish lockdown in early 2020, I discovered my love of drawing and painting, and even set up online art shops. Creating art has helped me deal with the stress of the pandemic and of my mother's situation. It has become my way of turning off the outside noise. This year, I’ve resolved to continue to draw and paint in my sketchbook every day. Whether that will translate into making more money isn’t important to me, though I’ll admit that I get excited and enjoy the extra validation that comes with selling a piece of art. My second journey for 2022 is returning to graduate school. Like my husband Jim, I was recently admitted to the Master of Arts in Interdisciplinary Studies program at the University of Texas at Dallas. My focus will be gender studies and economics. Why? I spent my career in the male-dominated world of finance and banking, and I’ve written about my experiences and the challenges women face. I’ve also been interviewed about the gender pay gap. It’s an issue I’m passionate about and want to explore in depth. Classes are set to start in late January. I hope that, by drawing…
Read more » Riding It Out
Jiab Wasserman | Apr 27, 2020
IN MID-MARCH, I WENT into lockdown with optimistic thoughts. Perhaps it would give me time to perfect my Spanish, master classical guitar, write more blog posts, start online courses and even begin the book that Jim and I often discuss writing together. I’ve accomplished none of my grand plans. Instead, I’ve been consumed by reading COVID-19 news. I’ve slept poorly and eaten too much. I remain perpetually exhausted. I struggle to focus and lack creativity. Everything takes twice as long as usual. My sense of time and motivation has completely gone out the window. Before I retired in 2018 and we moved to Spain, I worked from home for seven years, so I’m no stranger to spending most of my time in the house. But it’s harder to stay home when you’re retired, without the need to make day-to-day work decisions and interact with colleagues. I’m trying hard not to feel guilty about my mood or lack of accomplishments. Apparently, all this is normal. My feelings of grief are, it turns out, part of a greater collective grief. There have been countless articles about coping with the recent stock market downturn and about how to keep ourselves entertained at home. But very few cover the mental health aspects of today’s stay-at-home orders. The months ahead will be rough on everybody. What to do? Here’s how Jim and I are trying to sustain ourselves through these hard times: 1. Acknowledge loss and grief. According to David Kessler, an expert on grief, understanding the stages of grief is a key place to start. The stages aren’t linear and may not happen in the same order. Jim and I have discussed our emotional responses. As I write this, I flip between sadness and acceptance, while Jim is alternating between anger and acceptance. There…
Read more » Buen Camino
Jiab Wasserman | Apr 30, 2019
ON APRIL 3, MY HUSBAND Jim and I were among 262 pilgrims who made our way into Santiago de Compostela to receive an official pilgrim’s certificate for completing the required distance along one of the famous El Camino’s several routes—the most popular of which is some 500 miles. We were now certified peregrinos, or pilgrims. Because it was early in the season, ours was one of the slow days for Camino completion. Last August, 2,000 certificates per day were issued. Walking El Camino is gaining in popularity not just with Spaniards, but also with folks from around the world. In 2018, there were 327,328 certificates issued, compared to just 2,491 in 1986. This begs the question: Why do people commit themselves to such an arduous walk, which can take weeks to complete? In an age that provides convenience, comfort, speed and efficiency, thousands from around the globe walk hundreds of miles, enduring considerable physical demands, long periods of solitude, and deprivation from most modern comforts and conveniences. I can’t answer that question for all pilgrims. But I can honestly say that it was one of the most memorable experiences of my life. The certificate at the end was, of course, nice to receive, but that was the least of it. In The Pilgrimage, Paulo Coelho wrote, “It is the road that teaches us the best way to get there, and the road enriches us as we walk its length.” El Camino enriched me in three ways: I had the feeling of being fully present. I recently retired after working more than 25 years in the business world, where I had to be simultaneously mindful of the past, the current situation and the future. The simple act of walking, putting one foot in front of the other for mile after mile, hour after hour, brought…
Read more » Saving Happiness
Jiab Wasserman | Nov 4, 2020
RESEARCHERS HAVE spent decades probing the connection between money and happiness. For instance, a much-cited 2010 study by academics Daniel Kahneman and Angus Deaton found that folks tend to feel happier the more money they make—but only up to a point, which they estimated to be about $75,000 a year. But using only income to measure the link between money and happiness is incomplete. Another study, entitled “How Your Bank Balance Buys Happiness,” analyzed the connection to people’s “cash on hand.” The researchers found that having more money in checking and savings accounts was associated with higher levels of life satisfaction. But similar to the income studies, so-called liquid wealth appeared to be subject to diminishing returns, with the impact on life satisfaction tapering off as folks have more. Which brings me to tennis. We recently moved from Granada, Spain, to Alicante, which is about 220 miles to the east and right on the Mediterranean. Alicante has milder weather that’s conducive to outdoor sports all year round, so most apartment complexes have tennis courts. My husband Jim accused me of looking for our new apartment based on the condition of the tennis courts first and the apartment second. Yes, I love playing tennis. I also have a fondness for tennis analogies. I think saving money is like playing good tennis defense, while making more money is like playing offense. There are plenty of YouTube videos of the best winning shots, but relatively few that focus on the defensive skill that’s needed to keep the ball in play. Playing defense isn’t flashy. Yet Novak Djokovic, arguably the world’s top player, is renowned for his defensive play and for his ability to turn defense into offense. Along the same lines, making more money, moving up the corporate ladder and building your own…
Read more » Fast Forward
Jiab Wasserman | Jun 19, 2019
HOLDING DOWN LIVING expenses is one part of the equation in achieving financial independence. But the other part is diligently and consistently saving and investing money. On that score, my husband Jim and I enjoyed four “lucky breaks” that accelerated our push for financial independence. Together, they helped catapult us into early retirement in just 15 years. 1. The Great Recession may have caused much short-term financial harm, but it also offered a great long-term opportunity. When the stock market crashed, we continued to max out our 401(k) and 403(b) plans, as well as contributing to 529 plans for our two boys’ college costs. We put these various accounts 100% into stock mutual funds, taking advantage of the lower share prices. In 2017, as we prepared to retire, I moved some money out of stocks and into bonds. I was stunned by how much we had earned. 2. During the Great Recession, I mentally prepared for the possibility that one of us would get laid off—most likely me, because I worked for a bank. That never happened. Both of us kept our jobs. Still, we strove to live as though we had just one income. When I got a raise or Jim earned extra from teaching summer school, we saved the money. We didn’t starve ourselves or skip family vacations. But we also didn’t pony up for a new car or new bathroom or new kitchen. 3. One of our sons received a full scholarship to one of the top public universities in Texas. That made college far less of a financial burden—and, as a result, both our boys were able to graduate from university with no debt. In fact, we even had some money left over in a 529 account. We owed taxes on the account’s earnings, but we were able…
Read more » Reversing Course
Jiab Wasserman | Apr 23, 2021
THREE YEARS AGO, Jim and I decided to retire to Spain. We were attracted by the promise of excellent health care, warm weather, low cost of living and travel throughout Europe. From there, we’d also be able to fly with relative easy to both the U.S. and Asia, allowing us to maintain family connections. All of this gave us a great quality of life for almost three years. Then COVID-19 hit. Like everyone else, we had to say goodbye to many activities, events and travel. More important, we were cut off from family and friends. During the lockdown, we had more time to explore new things. But we also had time to reflect on the things we’d lost that had always been there, invisibly supporting us. We came to realize three aspects of life were essential. First, it’s important for us to feel connected to loved ones and to reach them quickly in case of emergency, even if we were separated by thousands of miles. With the pandemic raging, Jim and I realized that if both of us became seriously ill in Spain or if one of our sons had an emergency back in the U.S., it was impossible for them to get to Spain and almost impossible for us to arrange a quick trip back. The unavailability of quick travel “in the event” was disturbing. Second, living in a community with friends is crucial to our emotional well-being. It’s no surprise that the disruption strained mental health for everyone, causing increased stress and anxiety. Loneliness became more widespread. I’m fortunate to have a good companion like Jim. A few of the expats we knew felt such loneliness that they were willing to risk infection to meet others. Third, as an expat, it isn’t easy to form deep friendships—those relationships…
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